Tuesday, October 28, 2014


The other day, I looked into the Catholic Rite of Marriage (which had a new edition come out this year). I thought some of the things were interesting.

For example, Catholics don't believe in the superstition that the bride and groom can't see each other before the wedding. (Catholicism is against all superstition, as a general rule.) As a result, it is recommended that the bride and groom stand outside the church before the wedding, so they can welcome everyone as they arrive. I think that sounds like a good idea.

The typical American wedding starts with the priest and groom at the altar. Then they play "Here Comes the Bride", as the bride goes down the aisle. At the end, the bride's father gives her away to the groom.

None of that happens in a Catholic wedding. Instead, Catholic weddings follow the normal procession rules, which means the bride and groom go together, not separately. Also, the father does not give his father away, which is fine by me, because that is sort of a sexist tradition to begin with.

Of course, the rules and guidelines can be adapted for pastoral reasons, and I'm sure many Catholics have American-style weddings, not Catholic-style weddings. I know which one I'd rather go with! (Hint: the one where I do things, not the one where I hide in the background while everyone goes gaga over fancy dresses.)


Anonymous said...

This is pretty interesting. I knew that playing 'here comes the bride' is not allowed but I didn't know any of the others. I do like the idea of the groom not seeing the bride before the wedding though. Of course not the superstitious belief but I just love seeing the groom see the bride for the first time. Call me a romantic. :P

lence said...

oh, c'mon, be like everyone and take lost of selfies at the altar ;)

Anonymous said...

I have attended plenty of Catholic weddings, and they usually go with the typical American-style weddings. I do quite like the idea of not going with the whole "father passes her off" thing, though.

I never really saw the point of avoiding the groom before the wedding, but I just went along with it, as most people do.

Emily said...

I'm getting married in two weeks and my dad and I have agreed that we're not doing that mess where he gives me away. I'm not property to be traded, I'm a person who's meeting my future spouse as an equal to make a commitment to each other.

And we're definitely planning on getting ready for the wedding together even though everyone keeps telling us it's bad luck. We know we're going to be nervous, so we want to be with each other for reassurance. I mean, if you can't count on your fiancee for reassurance why are you getting married?