Sunday, January 5, 2014

Worst of Blackmoor Manor, Chapter 11

Here is Chapter 11 of my parody story, Nancy Drew: Worst of Blackmoor Manor. Today, Nancy talks with Mrs. Drake.
 
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Nancy Drew was talking to Mrs. Drake.
 
"So, what do you think is wrong with Linda?"
 
"I don't know, and the doctors don't know. Nobody seems to know anything!" Mrs. Drake said with a hint of frustration in her voice. "All I know is that Linda is unwell, and I am to look after the manor in her stead."
 
"Actually, I was trying ask if...this is kind of a weird question...has she always had super-hairy arms?"
 
"No, of course not," Mrs. Drake said. "Why? Is there a problem with her arms? Did you see her behind the curtain?"
 
"I only saw her hand, and it was covered with hair! Like...a werewolf."
 
"Tut tut!" Mrs. Drake clicked with her mouth. "Please don't tell me that you are falling for that ridiculous old story about the Blackmoor Beast. I know you thought you saw something when you arrived, but I can assure you that Linda is not a lycanthrope."
 
Nancy had no response, because she had no idea what lycanthropy was. Instead of speaking, Nancy felt her upper lip, in order to confirm that the manor did not cause its residents to start growing hair spontaneously.
 
"Okay, I don't have a mustache," Nancy said. "That means Linda's not a werewolf."
 
"Excuse me?" Mrs. Drake asked.
 
"You're excused," Nancy said. "But I have a question about Loulou the parrot. Do you know her magic word?"
 
"Magic word? Oh, yes," Mrs. Drake said. "You see, my brother and father used to play a word game with Loulou. I never understood how it was played, but sometimes she'd grow sullen and refuse to play the game anymore until they told her that...let's see...what was it again? It's on the the tip of my tongue...Ah. They'd have to tell her that 'Loulou is very, very clever and beautiful bird'."
 
"Great, thanks," Nancy said. "There's one more thing I want to talk about, though. Ethel and Jane are dressing up in weird costumes and doing chant rituals at 3:15 in the morning, in order to pour oil in the hole in the floor. You know about this, right?"
 
Mrs. Drake threw Nancy out of the conservatory twenty seconds later.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hahahahahaha! Best chapter yet!

Anonymous said...

Hey Michael, do you ever get stalked on facebook?

Anonymous said...

" Anonymous said...
Hey Michael, do you ever get stalked on facebook?"

Utterly creepy, I must say!

Goose said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Hi Michael, I found this blog after watching some of your Nancy Drew walk-throughs - amazingly helpful when I gave up halfway through The Crystal Skull (the puzzles in that one were killing me, but I just had to see how it ended). I am in the middle of Blackmoor manor right now and found this hilarious. I'm looking forward to seeing how the game explains Linda's hairy arm!