Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The Soulmate Theory

I think the next step in this week's discussion of men and women is to discuss complementarianism. That is a large word, so I'm going to lead up to it, by discussing "the soulmate theory".

You're probably heard of soulmates before.  The concept pops up all the time in romantic movies.  The idea is that two people are "soulmates", which means they form the perfect romantic couple.  These two people were specifically made for each other, and they go together so well that almost become one person.  They "share a soul", so to speak, hence the term "soul-mate".

The idea is that your soul is incomplete, until you find your soulmate.  He or she is the missing half of your soul; your soulmate fills up what is lacking in your own soul.  For example, take Call Me Maybe.  In this song, Carly Rae Jepsen talks about how she is incomplete, until her soulmate comes along and makes her whole; she says, "Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad, and you should know that".

The idea of soulmates is popular, but it is accused of being anti-feminist for these reasons.

1. It starts from the position that women and men are incomplete without each other.  This upsets people who believe women are complete by themselves.

2. Since the two genders provide and lack certain things, this would mean that men and women are not equal.  Men have things women don't have, and women have things men don't have.

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I think that's enough for today.  What do you think of the concept of soulmates?  Is it good or bad?  Are there problems with it?  Is it anti-feminist?  Can we come up with a variation of the soulmate theory which avoids some of its problems?

9 comments:

Suzanne Klare said...

I didn't expect for you to come up with "Call Me Maybe" as an example, but that's not important. Cause if that were completely true, fate would've organized it in a way, where nobody dies alone, and the to soulmates die at the same time, because they're souls are "bond" together. I like to believe that there's something like soulmates, but I don't think it's like you have to share a soul with the one you love. I'd like to say "life-mates", because you share a life together. I guess everyone would want a relationship like that. But for all the romantic people out there (including myself), if you don't find someone (or have someone) you love, that's OK. Life normally isn't like a fairytale, movie or book (or Twilight, wich is all three of those things). Wich doesn't mean it can't be like a fairytal, movie or book (and if you're very lucky, or very unlucky, like Twilight).

Anonymous said...

Soulmates apply to same-sex couples. Two individual people are incomplete without each other, but these two people do not need to be of opposite genders.

Anonymous said...

I believe God has soulmates for those who are ment to marry. The whole idea that each of us are incomplete until we find our true love is rather logical. Many people live for years with a bit of emptyness in their hearts until they "meet" or develop a relationship with their soulmate. Some automatically feel this hole and others do not realize the existance until they meet their beloved. My personal belief is that soulmates do exist.

Breanna(; said...

I agree with the second Anonymous.

Anonymous said...

go to seatle unless. u do not believe in ur self. but of course u just could just exploit the target audience of the nancy drew games.

Emma said...

YES I AGREE @Anonymous 10:07 love is love!

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure if there are soul mates or not. But I do believe that some people are more compatible than others, thus creating a relationship to begin with. This takes time, energy and a lot of communication...which to me has nothing to do with being a soul mate and more to do with the willingness of the people involved to continue their relationship. Does that make sense? I don't know, it makes sense to me...

Anonymous said...

ARGLEFUMPH STARTED THE BLIND PLAY THROUGH 4 NANCY DREW GHOST OF THORNTON HALL!!!!

Lori P. said...

I don't know about the word soul mates, but my husband said when he asked me to marry him 25 years ago this July, that I complemented him. He found in me someone different then himself, though we shared a lot of the same interests. But he said some of things in his personality & make up were added to by who I was. Does that make sense? The differences made our relationship interesting & fun.