Monday, November 14, 2011

Abraham Lincoln Comments on Nancy Drew: Alibi in Ashes

I managed to find our good friend Abraham Lincoln and interview him about the latest Nancy Drew game.

Abraham Lincoln: Hello my friend and how are you this fine day?
Michael: I am a little tired, good sir.
Abraham Lincoln: That's nice to hear.
Michael: Are you excited for the new Twilight movie?
Abraham Lincoln: Most likely I'm not. I am just putting on an act.
Michael: I hear they're splitting the last movie up into two parts, just like Harry Potter did.
Abraham Lincoln: If they are, I'll never forgive them.
Michael: Wow, I never pictured you as such a Twilight-hater. Moving on, though, have you played the new Nancy Drew game?
Abraham Lincoln: Oh yes, I have played quite a lot. Come to think of it, I have also been to the movies quite a lot.
Michael: Not the Twilight movies, I presume. Did you like Alibi in Ashes?
Abraham Lincoln: You're joking! I would have run ten miles to get away from Alibi.


Michael: Oh...so you don't think it's a good videogame. Why not?
Abraham Lincoln: Ok.
Michael: Ok what?
Abraham Lincoln: I could try telling you what, but then you'd have to get your head round the technical terms. Are you ready for that?
Michael: I am ready. I am prepared. Tell me, Abe.
Abraham Lincoln: Then maybe you should go to bed. I was a "self-made" man being both self-educated and self-disciplined. The Whig party (which came before the Republican Party) espoused these ideals and I identified with that. My legal career and temperment were both highly suited to being a "Whig." Today, given the shift if party beliefs and political positions, I'm not entirely sure which party I would endorse. Fancy that, mine too.
Michael: So...you dislike Alibi in Ashes, for political reasons. That makes sense, I guess. Are you upset that the River Heights Town Hall gets burned in the game, or are you more upset at the less-than-ideal portayal of Toni Scallari, the town's councilwoman?
Abraham Lincoln: Yes I am upset, but don't worry. Upset doesn't bite!
Michael: No, I asked what upsets you more: Toni or the Town Hall.
Abraham Lincoln: What upsets -- that's rather a tricky question. The trouble is, one upset appears to be much like another.
Michael: Some people think that Toni Scallari is based off Sarah Palin. What do you say?



Abraham Lincoln: I think she was a very interesting choice. be good and treat everyone like you would like to be treated.
Michael: Would you have voted for Toni Scallari, though, knowing that she dislikes Nancy Drew?
Abraham Lincoln: I certainly would. Just watch me!
Michael: What?! ABE! Are you saying that you hate Nancy?
Abraham Lincoln: I don't believe I know anyone by that name.
Michael: Nancy Drew, the girl accused of burning down the town hall.
Abraham Lincoln: I don't know about that, and as a matter of interest I really don't need to know! What else are you able to talk to me about?
Michael: You are totally avoiding the topic, Mr. President, and I have the feeling it's because you secretly dislike Nancy Drew almost as much as you dislike Twilight.
Abraham Lincoln: Quite right, I am. But then, so is the gorilla in the Berlin zoo. Or so I was told.
Michael: I knew I should have let Brenda Carlton handle this interview. You can't give me a straight answer.
Abraham Lincoln: Frankly that's not my favourite subject.
Michael: Did you just use the British spelling of "favorite"?
Abraham Lincoln: I like classical music.
Michael: ...Right. Anyway, I think we should end this interview. Any final thoughts on Nancy Drew: Alibi in Ashes?
Abraham Lincoln: Ok. With hard work and determination nearly everthing is possible. He was definitely much cooler and better looking than I was. He was the star football player to my loner, intellectual vibe. I can't compete with Camelot. I'll tell you that he's pretty cool to chat with...great story teller.
Michael: Goodbye, Abe.
Abraham Lincoln: Goodbye, it was nice speaking with you.

Wow, Abraham Lincoln really dislikes Alibi in Ashes.  Do I feel the same way?  Tune in tomorrow to find out, as I review the game myself!

(If I can finish writing the review by then.)

19 comments:

Philip said...

Michael: I love, love, love, love, LOVE your interviews with Abe!! I hope you talk more with him in the future. (Hint hint)

Hadley said...

I agree with Philip.

Invisible said...

Favourite, nice choice Mr. Lincoln.

Anonymous said...

lol
Michael- Did you just use the british spelling of 'favorite'?

Abe- I like classical music.

Izzy said...

@anonymous at 1:42pm

Haha Abe is so random!

Anonymous said...

VERY funny!

Anonymous said...

Oh Michael...... You delight me.....! Lol please dont stop being you!!!!!!!

ms. Saturday said...

wow mister prez oops I should be studying ON A MONDAY

Anonymous said...

Abe Lincoln: He likes classical music.

Katherine said...

Haha!!! :) That was amazing! Wow Michael you are awesome! You make my day!

And apparently Mr. Lincoln likes classical music! I did not know that!

Moriah said...

That was very funny indeed! Abe is so halarious , I always love your jokes & Nancy Drew walkthroughs that part 11 of Nancy Drew : Alibi in Ashes was pretty intense , halarious , and dramatic all at the same time!

Hadley (and sometimes Alex) said...

@moriah by any chance is your last name Seebold?

Anonymous said...

THAT was funny, you made my day !

Rhiannon said...

Michael, do you have a flux capacitor somewhere that we don't know about and can I borrow it? I want to go back and talk to Edgar Allen Poe. I have a feeling a convo with him would be very interesting.

Anonymous said...

I just asked Abe if he truly hates the Nancy Drew game. His responce?
Abe: Yes, I always choose the right moment to hate Nancy Drew. If you hate it too soon, there's a danger you'll hurt it. Hate it too late, and you'll probably get hurt yourself.

So it's confirmed. Abe doesn't like Nancy Drew :(

Justice said...

Those persona-bot things are simply hilarious (you should see how my chat with John Lennon went!). I tend to grin and giggle until my face hurts when you post these 'conversations'. :D Thanks, Michael!

Art said...

More often than not I do not post comments on web sites, but I would like to say that this article really compelled me to do so! Thanks for your insightful post.

Balin said...

Michael: I hear they're splitting the last movie up into two parts, just like Harry Potter did.
Abe: If they are, I'll never forgive them.

BEST. RESPONSE. EVER.

Anonymous said...

My conversation;

Abe: how are you feeling on this fine day!

Me: great

Abe: superb

Me: How do you feel about black friday?

Abe: same way as I feel about people.

Me which is ...

Abe: Are you serious! Please do not treat this as a laughing manner

Me: bye

Abe: my great wife mary...